Man Attempts Sex With Bike

No, it's not a joke. A man has been arrested, tried and sentenced for simulating sex with his bike. In a hotel room.

He is now on the sex offenders register.

What the hell is going on here ? I admit his tastes are . . . . unusual, but putting him on the sex offenders register ? How deranged is that ? It's not like he dropped his trousers in a public place for all and sundry to see. He was in a room in a hostel and the cleaners walked in on him.

I don't see that any crime was actually committed. But he was charged with the catch all "breach of the peace". Which, to me, still makes no sense whatsoever. Until the cleaners unlocked the door and entered his room no one was bothered by his behaviour. His conducted may have been disorderly, but he was in the privacy of his hostel room until someone else disturbed his peace.

Personally, had I been one of the cleaners, I would just have apologised for the interruption, closed the door and then, possibly, have died laughing.