Post Topic

Last night, when we arrived home after spending time with friends in the pub, I had a great idea for a post. It was genius. I remember thinking "Wow, that's going to be so brilliant I think I might self combust from the cleverness of me !". Or something like that.

Can't remember what the idea was. It was probably a wine-fuelled failure of an idea anyway.

On another occasion at a party with friends, and wine or beer or some such thing, a group of us discovered the meaning of life. We talked about it for hours, everything so clear, we were going to sort out our lives and find true, deep happiness. Then we were going to tell the world so everyone could live happy lives. Revolution, man. Not one of us could remember what the hell it was next day. Oh we tried, we tried really hard to remember. Perhaps we did truly find the meaning of life and we forgot because ...... well we were drunk. I was going to make up some lofty reason, no one's supposed to find enlightenment at that stage of their lives, blah blah blah but the truth is we were drunk and probably gibbering about nothing important at all. After some booze we probably became convinced that the meaning of life was something to do with the cat's tail or something just as stupid. Although ........ no one ever asked the cat, and he was sober. Hmmmmm.........

Gossip Mags, Red Rags

I have just sat through another advert for some pointless gossip mag and I want to scream. I don't care what Posh/Colleen/Paris/any of those people are supposedly up to. Neither do I need to know this weeks "loose 7lbs in a week plan". Fuck off, just fuck off. These mags are a total waste of paper. They are part of the whole glorification of celebrity, and the cult of making us feel crap about ourselves. Who defines celebrity ? From the adverts and seeing these things in the newsagents to be a celebrity these days takes nothing. Appear in a reality t.v. show, Big Brother seems to be the cream of the crop here, sleep with someone famous then agree to appear in a lads mag, date someone famous, a footballer if you can manage. I remember flicking through one of these mags while at the doctors and reading about a woman whos dream in life was to marry a premiership footballer, to become a WAG. To this end she spent all her money on achieving the WAG look, spent her time trawling footballer hangouts and befriending people she thought could introduce her at the right levels. Some fucking dream. I mean my dream in life is to be happy and from the pictures I've seen of the Queen WAG, Mrs Beckham, happiness doesn't seem to be part of the perfect WAG package. Does that girl ever smile ?

Actually I just annoyed myself by knowing who and what any of this is and writing about it. Shit. As for the cult of make us feel crap, I might just leave that to another day.

Race

I had a conversation with a friend today. Wow, I know. It covered many topics including my dislike of the word race, as applied to different groups of humans. I dislike it because it implies that different races exist. As far as I am concerned there is only one race - the human race. I think the word race makes it easier for all the bigoted, narrow minded arseholes in this world to justify their behaviour and opinions, even if only to themselves. Add power crazy arses to that. I am not saying that I don't think notable differences exist between groups of humans but they are differences within the human race. Differences of skin colour, culture, language, religion, any other defining factor you can think of are not an excuse, reason or justification for the horrendous treatment of any member of the human race.

So there.

Question, The Second

Why do I start running the water to wash the dishes, go sit down and forget until the very last possible moment ?

I like that I avert disaster every time but why don't I learn ?

Feminist Thinking ?

People, well a few people, have either accused (it's the tone of voice that does it) me of being, or have asked me if I am, a feminist. The answer is I'm not sure. Since I don't know what their idea of a feminist is I have no idea what they mean by the question. Ok, the accusing ones we can assume don't mean anything nice by it. In which case I usually just agree to piss them off. I'm a little twisted. As the question perplexed me I have been loitering around some feminist web sites and blogs trying to figure it out. Still not sure. So I'm off on a voyage of discovery to read some stuff and see what I think about the idea, current debate and if in the end I am a feminist

So here's a few things that I think to start with:

Women and men should receive equal pay for equal jobs.

No one, male, female hermaphrodite, transgender, should be barred from employment because of their gender as is, or as was, or because they changed it.

I believe that a woman has the right to control her capacity for reproduction.

No one should be the victim of sexual harassment, abuse or rape.

Maternity and paternity leave and pay rights should be equal.

Well, it's not an over arching life guiding philosophy but, as I said, it's a start. These ideas are just ones that have been rattling around in my head for as long as I can remember ever considering the subjects. To me they just seem obvious. Feel free to jump on my ideas all you like. It won't change them but I like a laugh so knock yourself out.

However I have come across a few detailed debates about whither you can wax and be a feminist. One writer, can't remember where but I'll try to find it again, even said she was aware of feeling superior to women who participated in beauty rituals because she doesn't. She sees them in the street and pity's them. 'Scuse me ? So you judge women on their appearance. Nice. Let me know how that works out for you. Well this judgement is not based on your non beauty ritual participation, it's based on you stupid ass opinions. Go fuck yourself. The knockout redhead in the killer heels, groomed to perfection who just breezed past you might be the smartest, most successful person you'll ever meet ...... wait, no point in continuing that thought. You'll never meet her 'cause you decided she was some sort of airhead slave to the patriarchy based on her personal grooming habits. Git.

In fairness the writer of the piece did says that she knew she shouldn't make those judgements. Tip for you then. Don't. As far as I could tell, and I happily admit that there was a minimum of effort put in to checking, these people feel the need to tell me that to be a feminist, to support equal rights for women and further the cause I need abandon the current imposed image of womanhood and take on their, good and proper, idea of womanhood. Please, it's this way to the short pier, might I advise that madame try a very long run off it ? Tell you what, you worry about what the women of this world look like, I'm off to use my brain. Maybe I'll put some make up on while I do.

Oi ! Pumpkin !

A little message for Pumpkin, as far as I know, my only reader (at least I think she reads this !).

Thanks for the comments, but the last one ......wtf ? Intelligence ? Here ? Did you get me confused with someone else ? I checked and rechecked but haven't found any. Did find lots on your blog though. Loving you blog. Glad you don't have Parkinsons, that would have really sucked. Liking the changes.

I'll try to keep up with spouting my usual silliness just for you me dear. And I'll be over to catch up with the goings on of you, Gozar and Husband soon.

I'm Baaack

Wow, it's been awhile but really I had better things to do. We had an unexpected guest for a week which kind of killed my pre-trip plans. Oh well. I was then off in a foreign land, enjoying good food, wine and company. There was sunshine too. And a wedding. I'm not much into the whole wedding thing personally but what ever floats your boat. The bride was beautiful, the groom handsome and they really were poster people for being totally loved up. Very sweet.

Now I have half a week to get ready for my next little jaunt. My head is aching at the prospect. But I'm looking forward to the trip, you see I get to visit the AGF. Me and AGF haven't had a good face to face catch up for ages, a sea seperates us these days. Freakin' sea.

Time to sign off and get some sleep. It's been a long day of travelling.

Chopsticks

My boyfriend says that chopsticks wouldn't work. Not enough grip. So I think adding a little bit of wax to the end of the chopsticks to ensure grip should sort that.

Question

Why are parcels delivered before eight in the morning without fail while they can't get my mail to me before lunch ?

Bikini Wax Hell

Who came up with the idea of ripping pubic hair out with wax ? Or at all actually. I really need to know. I need to hunt them down and rip every hair in their nasty little body. Every hair. One by one. With chop sticks. Or something more painful when I think of it.

Hmm. Would chopsticks work ? Hell, let's give it a whirl, if they don't I'll adapt. Donning thinking cap now.

I went for my first ever bikini wax today, in case you hadn't guessed. Twenty fucking minutes of hair being ripped from my body, for which I had to pay. Pain is not fun, that's why it hurts. Then I'm told I'm bleeding, but that's okay, it's normal on your first wax. Run that one by me again ? Bleeding from where you just ripped my pubic hair out from the roots is ok ? And she said it with a smile. Fucking sadist.

It will not be happening again. The razor is my friend. Or maybe Immac.

Public Goosing, or Sexual Assault on National TV

I was wandering around the BBC News web site when I tripped across this piece.

A female Channel 4 reporter had her bum pinched while doing a live broadcast. The man who pinched her is now the subject of a police search. And so the little prick should be. The reporter said she thought that it was disrespectful considering she was reporting on flood hit areas. 'Cause obviously it would have been fine if she'd been reporting on something light hearted. Idiot.

It is not ok ever for a anyone to pinch the rear end of someone they don't know. Or someone you do know if that behaviour is outwith the boundaries of that relationship. She did admit to feeling humiliated, and felt that no male reporter would have been treated in that manner. Despite being humiliated on national tv, and recognising that it only happened because she is a woman she will not be pressing assault charges. Despite the police contacting her about it. Seriously, this woman is bugging me. Then she mused,

"But I did wonder, if I accepted such behaviour without complaint, what hope do women who are groped in public in this way have of any recourse?"

So do something about it you git ! Take the police up on their plan and press charges against the worthless little worm. Stand up and say "No, this behaviour is unacceptable". Get a fucking backbone. But no, she'd rather let it slide. Since she won't be pressing charges the little shit will get an £80 fine. Well that's alright then, eh ?

Mind you, personally I would just have rounded on the fucker and called him on his behaviour. Then he could have been publicly humiliated.